Oy

I went to the doctor recently, and he diagnosed me with a few syndromes. After all that I've been through medically the last few years, believe you me, I was thrilled to locate a doctor who gave me an actual diagnosis; instead, most doctors I've seen related to my current issues have told me it's "all in my head" - versus simply acknowledging that they don't understand what's going on with me (due to their own medical incompetency). While in his office, the doctor drew blood to get a snapshot of my health before sending me for some extensive testing.

As it had been over a week since his office sent in the blood work, I rang his office the other day to ensure that I could go ahead and book the tests. Oh no, said the medical assistant. My blood work is a horror. Not only am I in seriously bad shape (chasve shalom), but they need to run several more tests, to rule out some pretty serious stuff. I was, quite frankly, shocked.

Now surely, I understand intellectually that my body's inability to absorb nutrients adversely affects my health. In fact, I have finally accepted that I will most probably never regain the level of health I had prior to my car accident(chasve shalom [again]). But to get the news that I was already in the health dumpster? Pretty harsh news, to say the least.

I am now in the midst of taking all necessary measures to address each medical issue. And I can't say that I'm not nervous; both the best case and worst case scenarios they're positing aren't good. Yet I'm remaining positive, following my general strategy of remaining optimistic until I have concrete evidence that I should tone down the optimism.

After all, in life, you've got to roll with the punches. And where will being all Eeeyore-ish get me anyway, even if I did decide to be all "it's my birthday and nobody remembered"? Not very far, that's where. Better instead to be a Tigger, trust in Hashem no matter what the outcome, and hope for the best.

It is, after all, His World, B'H".